« Blog Index

Camel Toe

Posted December 10, 2016 by Maurice Tannenbaum

Last Saturday, a warm spring day, when a regular client arrived for a blow dry with one of my most creative and successful stylists. She arrived wearing shorts, heavy on the short. She’s a trim and often well dressed lady. However, another client remarked on what happened when the woman sat down. Her shorts got even shorter, her Hadassah thighs spread, and she looked like she wasn’t wearing shorts at all. I wondered whether all the mirrors in her house were from her waist up. How could she not know that her legs in those shorts would completely destroy her total appearance and actually make her look vulgar? Although her calves were not svelte, they would pass in a skirt or shorts to the knee.

And, to add to it this woman has a voice that carries! I mean CARRIES!!! Her pitch scares glass as it projects conversation that isn’t subtle. Once she was on her cell phone the entire time she was in the salon, which include during her shampoo and blow out. Didn’t miss a beat! Can you imagine how loud she needed to speak when the water was running and her head was in the sink? Not to mention that her phone could have been ruined. The entire salon could hear every word she was saying. Another client wanted to talk to her about, but I intervened as the woman on the phone holds a very important position in the community. Can you imagine?

Don’t women (and men) see themselves? Don’t they know that they have strengths and weaknesses in their appearance and their personas? We can be just as unattractive as attractive in both the way we dress and our behavior.

What about those women who are “fleshy” and insist on wearing spandex and leave nothing to the imagination. Wouldn’t a dress or loose slacks and a top be just as comfortable, if not more so? I had a housekeeper who was Rubenesque. All her clothes fit too tight and she seemed to think it made her look “sexy.” I know, why would you want to look sexy cleaning a house anyway? I remember one day she wore a jumpsuit that had zippered breast pockets and the zippers hung like nipples. I thought they were tassels!

And that leads me to camel toe. It’s no an attractive look like a cleavage, right? I wonder if they think men will be turned on by seeing the actual shape of a vagina. And it seems that camel toe is almost always on a woman who is overweight or unattractive. It seems like it would be uncomfortable anyway? If my balls were being squashed by clothes fitting tight in the crotch I would uncomfortable and embarrassed.

Nobody is perfect, but why flaunt the negatives? A few months ago, I was twelve to fifteen pounds overweight. So, I wore my shirttails untucked or a sweater that covered my love handles and gut. While dressing, I would try on clothes that might have fit when I was at my best weight and then checked the fit. If it wasn’t a good fit, I would try something else. I don’t consider myself a vain man – I just want to look good.

It really doesn’t take much to look in a mirror and take off what doesn’t work. Then again, make sure that you show off your best features. Got breasts, show them off. I don’t mean take them out but wear something that is flattering. If you have nice legs, let’s see. Legs always look good in heels, but heels aren’t appropriate for all occasions. I have a client who has great gams (or at least did when she was younger) and loved to wear heels. Heels with skirts, with shorts, with a bathing suit and I’m sure when she was getting dressed, before she even put on her underwear, she put on her heels. As she got older, her body changed and her skirts got shorter and her heels got higher. If she bent over to put down her handbag, she ran the risk of surprising us with the view. Now that’s a bit excessive! Again, where are the mirrors in her house? Nice ass, flaunt it! In pants or a skirt I mean, not naked, or not pants or a skirt that are too tight. That becomes vulgar and again, can lead to “Camel Toe.”

Don’t hide behind your clothes. They are intended to make you look attractive. Wear what works and get rid of what doesn’t. There is nothing more attractive than the art of teasing — not showing the whole thing. That’s what low-cut, a side slit in a skirt, a plunging neckline or back is all about.

Did you ever go to a nude beach? Not the prettiest sight, is it? Most of the people on nude beaches shouldn’t be there. But then again, that’s another consciousness.